The greatest of these is love
I attended Bible study today. the topic was on loving your spouse. We broke into two groups, men on one side and women on the other. each group was to come up with ways to show their spouses they loved them. Both groups began discussing the viewpoints of Gary Chapman’s “The Five Love Languages.” They both made predictable lists. the men can vacuum more and women can take up hunting and everyone feels loved.
My question is, “Is it our responsibility and/or mission to make those around us feel loved?”
I guess that seems harsh. But honestly I do not see any examples of this in the Bible. Yes, it is commanded that we love one another. But that does not necessarily translate into making each other feel loved. Most of the items on both lists from my Bible Study group contained ways that we can give our spouse what he or she wants. the point was, its not about what I want, its about what my spouse wants. I think the Bible teaches that its not about what either of us wants. Its about what God wants. The only love language we should concern ourselves with is God’s. And His love language is Obedience.
I do not remember God asking Gideon how he felt about leading the Israelites into battle. I suppose it should have been obvious.
He did not ask Deborah how she felt about being the warrior judge because the men around didn’t have the backbone to lead.
He didn’t ask Moses how he felt about leading the people out of slavery. In fact he got ticked off when Moses kept sharing his feelings of insecurity.
He didn’t have to ask Jesus. Jesus flat out told Him how he felt about it, “If there is anyway this cup can pass, please let it pass.” There wasn’t. It didn’t. God did not care how Jesus felt. Well that may not be exactly correct. I think he probably cared. And I think He cares about how we feel today. Its just that He knows that our feelings for what we want and His knowledge for what is best for us may not coincide.
Our feelings and our wants are not what is important to God. And so it logically follows that the same applies to our spouses. Their feelings and wants are not particularly important to God either. That’s harsh. That is not the Gospel that makes you feel good. Perhaps. But is evident from what I read in the Bible.
I don’t think that when I die, how much I worked around the house is going to come up:
God: Victor, I see here that you did not vacuum the living room for Kathleen on 11/21/2010. Because of this she did not feel loved.
Somehow, I doubt God cares if I vacuum or Kathleen vacuums. Of course that’s a bad example for us since we don’t have carpet, but you get the point. Who did the vacuuming this week has very little to do with the greater scheme of things in God’s world. I think it will go more like this:
God: Victor, did you love your wife?
Victor: Well, yeah, I think so.
God: Well let’s see. Were you patient?
Victor: I was, sometimes.
God: Were you Kind?
Victor: Most of the time.
God: Were you long suffering?
Victor: Oh yeah.
Well maybe not exactly like that. I’m sure you recognize the verses those questions reference. 1 Corinthians chapter 13. Commonly called the Generic Cialis Online Love Chapter. Look it up. This is a chapter that explains what love looks like from God’s perspective. This is not a check list of things for us to do in order for us to love. It is a description of what love appears like when we see it.
For example, if I describe something as somewhat round, red, has a small green stem sticking out the top and a couple of leaves. You realize I am describing an Apple. that does not mean if you make something round with a stick in the top you have built an apple. It means that if you see something that looks like my description, you may have an apple on your hands.
Chapter 13 works like that. Don’t use it to try build love where it is not. Instead of praying for patience, pray for love and the patience will flow. Instead of praying for forgiveness, pray for love and the fogiveness will take hold.
there are many gifts God has given us. The greatest is Love.
Prayers for you,
V
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